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I am a beautiful woman.   
05:22pm 17/06/2008
  I will be visiting Alaska this summer. I will let everyone know the exact dates when they are worked out, but it will likely be late July.

In the meantime, I would like everyone to remember what a beautiful woman I am. In case you forgot, I have my mother's face and my father's coloring. This means I'm a gorgeous red-head. Did you remember that? Chances are if you see me in Alaska I'm more beautiful than the last time you saw me. I look more like my mother and brother than ever as I have recently become a grown-up. I just want to warn you all. I am very beautiful. And talented.


Should I play a show while I'm in Alaska?
 
     

(2 chopped off hands | fantasize)

 
Too sane to be chubby, not crazy enough to be thin...   
11:42pm 08/06/2008
  I discovered last night that I have lost close to fifteen pounds since the last time I checked my weight. This kind of wigged me out.

I never actively changed my lifestyle so it's hard for me to imagine how it happened. It also bothers me that I never made the connection between having to tighten my belt and being able to share clothes with my friends and actually shedding those unsightly pounds and inches.

So what's going on here? I have a few theories:

1: I'm anorexic with the slowest onset of the disorder EVER encountered.

2: I have some kind of horrible terminal disease that causes me to lose weight.

3: Aliens took my tummy in some kind of "beautify the universe/feed the poor on Aloxanon 4" campaign.

Take your pick, dudes. I'm gonna order a friggin pizza.
 
     

(2 chopped off hands | fantasize)

 
   
01:41pm 04/05/2007
  http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=2026391559 <--- in other news, Kalyn made this because she is awesome.  
     

(1 chopped off hand | fantasize)

 
   
11:02am 16/02/2007
  I have a job. I am a barista.

I live in a shitty appartment with my ex-boyfriend who is also a barista.
 
     

(2 chopped off hands | fantasize)

 
   
02:04pm 06/01/2007
  Jake bought a dress for his show tonight and it fits me perfectly. Score.

I'm performing as "heroin Fag" because we were coming up with nams for the venue (Caroline's basement) and she said it couldn't be anything too druggy or too GAY so i suggested "Heroin Fag"

I am full of worry and constant sorrow.
 
     

(2 chopped off hands | fantasize)

 
   
08:00pm 29/11/2006
  Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting


YES.


YES.


YES.
 
     

(6 chopped off hands | fantasize)

 
   
01:15am 17/08/2006
  Birthday Birthday

YAy
 
     

(2 chopped off hands | fantasize)

 
   
01:18pm 17/07/2006
 
mood: sick
Dear Diary,

I went to the emergency room again last night for that terrible terrible unbearable ear pain. The ear drm ruptured again once i got home, i'm sure of it. Please let it heal by friday, please.

Love,

Ellen
 
     

(fantasize)

 
MEOW   
02:36pm 07/07/2006
  Dear Diary,

Today i'm going into the woods. I love you.

-Ellen
 
     

(fantasize)

 
I don't see what all the fuss is about!   
08:17pm 09/06/2006
  I must admit, i was kind of scared. They made me wait in that little room by myself for about ten minutes before they finally came in to take my teeth. I was hungry and deprived of caffine and starting to have second thoughts about sedation.

When i came to they told me i had been singing... What the hell?

I don't know... After a woozy hour or so going to the grocery store with my dad and hanging around my house,I felt relatively sane and sober and even with the local anasthetic worn off, i feel pretty good if not a little sore. Thanks to Rebecca for keeping me company all day. Now excuse me while i take another dose of hydrocodone.
 
     

(fantasize)

 
Happy thoughts   
01:07am 23/05/2006
 
mood: happy
My hair is long enough to get tangled.

Rebecca and i did crafts today. Crafts with buttons.

I might move out of my parents house.

Bike-riding is fun.

My teeth are really clean.

Curtains and pillows and dinner parties.
 
     

(2 chopped off hands | fantasize)

 
Lyrics   
01:41pm 15/05/2006
  1-2-3 STUPID

By Milkbear

1 2 3
1 2 3
1 2 ready go

I wouldn't argue if you mad me cry
saying i'm stupid and lazy, do you think I
don't know that do you?

I wouldn't get out of bed today
even if i knew that this was the best day
that I'll ever have.

1-2-3 Stupid and
1-2-3 Ugly
I know the truth
that we're actually lovely
and charming the pants of
the people we meet
we get honked at by cars
as we walk down the street
something is happening
everything's wonderful
something is happening
everything's wonderful

I think i'm stupid
You say i'm not ugly
i don't want attention
just someone to love me
and say i'm ok
for the things i've been wishing for
give me the compliments
i have been fishing for...
you think that don't you
think that don't you?

I wouldn't argue if you made me cry
saying i'm stupid and lazy
do you think i don't know that
do you think that
i dont know that do you?

1 2 3
1 2 3
1 2 ready go

***

I'm seriously considering using "Milkbear" as my solo name. Good idea?
 
     

(2 chopped off hands | fantasize)

 
allergies!!   
06:31pm 19/04/2006
 
mood: drained
Here are my upcoming shows:

April 22nd: The Jeffreys with Karen Scream of Karen and the Tiger at cafe Felix 7:00
April 19th: I think? not sure what this is about, but at Bitoz with full full KatT setup
May 3rd: Planned Parenthood thing at Lucky Monkey
May 19th: Shawn Holley and Fats Tunamelt with KatT

Things are going nicely. I have to plug away at my homework, but i'm so distracted and a little stressed out. I have some kick-ass new songs and cannot wait to share them.
 
     

(2 chopped off hands | fantasize)

 
a short poem by Ellen   
11:26pm 11/04/2006
  Where the ass meets the crotch
is where i am bruised
becasue today
my bicycle was used

fin
 
     

(1 chopped off hand | fantasize)

 
   
09:56pm 04/04/2006
  Image hosting by Photobucket

Poster by Jodie.

Music by Ellen. Go to the show.
 
     

(2 chopped off hands | fantasize)

 
   
09:00am 27/03/2006
  I spent spring break in Olympia and now a burst into periods when i can't stop smiling. I had a wonderful relaxing time and now i think i can get back into the swing of schoolwork and stuff maybe. I bought some pretty dresses and played some board games.

I have a psych test in an hour.

I think i'll go to kaladi's or somthing after class.
 
     

(6 chopped off hands | fantasize)

 
somthin' i gotta do.. oh hells yes   
10:22pm 13/03/2006
  So.. Everyone should go to the Lucky Monkey on friday night to see me. You should also go to see a whole BUNCH of other wonderful bands like the Moonknights. Singer-songwriters go first to get them out of the way. I'm opening because I have to pay my dues. If you see the fliers around, they say "Karen and the Tiger" in the list of bands, but that's not true. It's just me and I'll be playing songs you don't hear when you go see a Karen and the Tiger show.

I hope I don't make a fool out of myself. Dear Lord, I need approval from the scene.
 
     

(3 chopped off hands | fantasize)

 
subconsious fun   
10:38pm 06/03/2006
 
mood: tired
I had a dream where I had sex and knowingly killed two men in the process (try not to imagine the mechanics of that. There aren't any. twas dream magic murder). My lover and I cleaned up the blood with bleach and propped the bodies up near the door. There was a party going on one door over and the police stopped by to make sure everything was fine where we were. They found the bodies and i woke up.

Rebecca says i must be afraid of SOMETHING. Not sure what, though.
 
     

(2 chopped off hands | fantasize)

 
I'm full of tofu and awsome   
11:26am 03/03/2006
 
mood: tired
I used the phrase "last night" THREE times in the first part of my last post. I noticed this last night when i looked at it last night last night.

I skipped school yesterday. It felt pretty good. Jodie and i went to the library to check out CDs. I checked out nine including four i really actually wanted. So far the random ones are a mild dissappointment. I guess you can't judge an album by it's cover either.

I also checked out this book:

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Yes, i do intend to make a stuffed t-rex and I will tolerate no hilarious "emo kid" comments from the peanut gallery. Rebecca B, I'm looking at YOU.
 
     

(1 chopped off hand | fantasize)

 
moooooosick   
11:08am 02/03/2006
 
mood: aggravated
1. I stayed up last night to watch Ok GO on Jimmy Kimmel last night. Of course, they were awesome, but they looked and sounded kind of... tired. Damien Kulash always looks a little half lidded, but i think his eyes were swollen shut last night. Wierd.

2. I'm on a giant Cocorosie kick right now.. I'm actually listening to them more then Ok GO. I need to get another one of thier albums.

3. Who wants to go pawn shop shopping with me this weekend? I need to see if i can score some cheap mics and headphones. I understand that somtimes musicians pawn thier stuff becasue they're addicted to all sorts of things, and maybe I'll get lucky.

4. I still respect but am no longer moved by (and in some cases no longer enjoy) the following bands: The Postal Service, The Decemberists, The Shins, The Dresden Dolls. Eh, give it time.
 
     

(fantasize)